The Valero Verdict: Pet Sematary

Welcome to another edition of the “The Valero Verdict” movie review. In this I will give you a quick movie review with a couple of bullet points of which I either liked or disliked. I will end the review with rating of the movie and a short overall thoughts.

On the docket today, Pet Sematary. The remake of 1989 Horror film based on a book by Stephen King.

look at that thing, it’s terrifying looking.
  • The only thing remotely scary about this film was the cat, I mean just look at it. If you stare at that picture long enough, the cat takes your soul.
  • Jason Clarke is an amazing actor. The ONLY thing about this film that was good was him. He is one of the best actors in Hollywood and it showed in this film. He’s emotion is so raw in this film, you just felt everything that he felt throughout the entire film.
  • They somehow managed to make a 1 hour and 41 minute run time feel like 3 hours. The 3rd act dragged out and it was so uninteresting at that.
  • THE BACK OF SEMI-TRUCK HIT A KID AND THE KID DIDN’T EVEN HAVE A MARK ON THEM. (sorry for yelling)
  • We’ve made 1.3 trillion (don’t fact check me) Horror movies, can people stop going into random dark rooms? or can they stop locking themselves in rooms? That would be just great.
  • Best quote in this movie: “Good thing your no fucking vet.”

The Verdict:

* out of ***** stars

This just wasn’t a good movie, not even Jason Clarke’s phenomenal performance could save this movie. Lithgow was good in it, but outside of that, predictable, not scary (Minus that Cat that is going to give me nightmares forever), and dragged out 3rd act, this was another remake we did not need.

Should You See It?: Absolutely not. I’ve really debated what movie was worse, this or Dumbo. I would pay to see Dumbo fight the cat from this, I would lay AT LEAST $20 on the cat. That in itself would be more entertaining than both of these trash movies.

Tell me what you thought of the movie, hit me up on here or talk to me on Twitter @RickyValero_

Advertisements

The Valero Verdict: Shazam!

Welcome to another edition of the “The Valero Verdict” movie review. In this I will give you a quick movie review with a couple of bullet points of which I either liked or disliked. I will end the review with rating of the movie and a short overall thoughts.

On the docket today, Shazam!. Normally I would say something fancy here about the movie being highly anticipated or anything at all. How about we say, Could DC finally make a good movie?

  • Grazer/Levi/Angel connection as Shazam/Freeman/Batson is spectacular. Grazer himself having to have the chemistry between both of the key characters was very pivotal in this movie and he was great.
  • Zachary Levi was a fantastic Shazam. You got the perfect dose of confused, witty, sarcastic, warm and funny all wrapped up in one.
  • The weird playing of Slow Hands by Nail Horan in the background of the family dinner. Did someone actually listen to those lyrics prior to editing it into the film? It was just weird.
  • Story telling was spot on. Sanberg did a great job of putting the pieces together. I really enjoyed his investment into the characters and making you care about them.
  • My biggest problem was the ending, it felt like it was never going to end. It dragged out for maybe 15 minutes too long.

The Verdict:

*** 1/2 out of ***** stars

This was a strong movie, and a really shocking feel good movie. I liked the different lighthearted approach to the Super-Hero genre. It is one we really haven’t seen before. The chemistry between the leads was great, Mark Strong was a great villain and outside the 9 hour ending, the movie was a lot of fun. (Also DC finally making a good movie was a joke, calm down)

Should You See It?: Yes, and I think you should take the entire family. It was a whole lot of fun and a great feel good story for the kids to enjoy as well.

Tell me what you thought of the movie, hit me up on here or talk to me on Twitter @RickyValero_

The Valero Verdict: The Highwaymen

Welcome to another edition of the “The Valero Verdict” movie review. In this I will give you a quick movie review with a couple of bullet points of which I either liked or disliked. I will end the review with rating of the movie and a short overall thoughts.

On the docket today, the 100th movie about Bonnie & Clyde. I kid, the Netflix movie starring Kevin Costner and Woody Harrelson about the two Texas Rangers who helped take down Bonnie & Clyde.

This movie poster looks dumb.
  • Let me start with the positive. Costner and Harrelson have fantastic chemistry together. These two were a great pairing.
  • But the duo could not overcome the lackluster script. It felt like throughout the film they were going through the motions and I don’t blame the acting as it wasn’t bad, they just didn’t have much to work with.
  • The movie was so boring and dull, you were anticipating at some point the film would pick up and get moving and it never did.
  • The whole build is for the end (we all know what happens) and it came off as “just another scene”. I hated it so much because the whole movie led up to this moment and it fell flat on its face.

The Verdict:

* out of ***** stars

Netflix has been really good with a lot of the movies they have been making but this one misses the mark. Great casting in the two leads, Harrelson and Costner do their best to overcome a rough script but can’t even make the movie watchable.

Should You See It?: If you are bored and can’t find something to watch on Netflix, pick a random episode of The Office to watch and skip this garbage.

Tell me what you thought of the movie, hit me up on here or talk to me on Twitter @RickyValero_

The Valero Verdict: Aquaman

Welcome to another edition of the “The Valero Verdict” movie review. In this I will give you a quick movie review with a couple of bullet points of which I either liked or disliked. I will end the review with rating of the movie and a short overall thoughts.

On the docket today, Aquaman. The very highly anticipated DC movie starring Jason Momoa.

  • This story was a complete rip-off of Black Panther.
  • This movie really tried way too hard to be funny, like it got embarrassing at some points.
  • The colors were pretty.
  • The action was a bit lackluster, the “big fight” scene in the water was just horrendous, at times you didn’t even know who was who during the fight.
  • Momoa was okay, but honestly he didn’t really have much to work with here. The screenplay was not very good and they didn’t put him in position to succeed at all.
  • Arthur? I feel like you could go back in time and get a better Super-hero name for this guy, this is what I think when I hear Arthur.

The Verdict:

* out of ***** stars

A loaded cast with a terrible script, while colorful and pretty to look at (Add Momoa to that if you’d like) the film feels like one big dud. Aquaman is one of the characters that belongs in ensemble movies but not his own standalone film.

Should You See It?: Absolutely NOT. Especially on Date Night, don’t be like “You can stare at Jason Momoa for two hours”, THEY WILL LEAVE YOU. Just no.

Tell me what you thought of the movie, hit me up on here or talk to me on Twitter @RickyValero_

The Valero Verdict: Triple Frontier

Welcome to another edition of the “The Valero Verdict” movie review. In this I will give you a quick movie review with a couple of bullet points of which I either liked or disliked. I will end the review with rating of the movie and a short overall thoughts.

On the docket today, Triple Frontier. The big budget heist film from Netflix starring Ben Affleck.

Oscar Isaac, Ben Affleck and Charlie Hunnam
  • Let’s start with the soundtrack because it was certifiable bad ass. From Metallica to CCR to Bob Dylan to Pantera, it was loaded with some great songs and placed in the right spots throughout the film.
  • Good guys actually die, I HATE in action/shooting movies and everyone makes it out alive.
  • The action sequences were well shot, from the first one on, they were well placed, they were well shot and they felt meaningful. Sometimes you have sequences with action/shooting in films and you are often like, “why did that even happen”, it was refreshing not to have that in this film.
  • The goal in mind wasn’t an easily obtainable goal, they didn’t walk in, take what they wanted and walk out without any issues. That in itself was worth the price of admission. (well a fraction of my $9.99 Netflix hits me with)
  • Does Charlie Hunnam act as anyone other than Jax in any of his movies? Is it just me? You really could take his whole entire presence and pick it up and set it in a Sons of Anarchy scene and it would work. Just kind of bugs me.
  • Favorite quote: “Great trip boys, this turned out to be some full on cowboy shit.”

The Verdict:

*** out of ***** stars

This what I believe in Hollywood is a Popcorn flick, it isn’t your most well acted, it’s not the best script, and no one is winning any Oscars but it’s a very fun action flick.

Isaac was easily the star of the show, I felt like he portrayed his character fine in this and was easily the best thing about this film. The rest of the acting was just fine, Affleck was Affleck, Hunnam was Jax and the rest of the cast was okay.

The story isn’t going to knock your socks off but you are going to enjoy some fun shooting, with a decent story and a solid twist or two.

Should You See It?: Toss some popcorn in the microwave, sit down and enjoy an action packed heist movie.

Tell me what you thought of the movie, hit me up on here or talk to me on Twitter @RickyValero_

The Valero Verdict: Us

Welcome to another edition of the “The Valero Verdict” movie review. In this I will give you a quick movie review with a couple of bullet points of which I either liked or disliked. I will end the review with rating of the movie and a short overall thoughts.

On the docket today, Us the highly anticipated second movie from Oscar winner Jordan Peele.

  • Lupita Nyong’o was brilliant in this film. Both version of her. She played a wide range of emotions all wrapped up in both of her characters. She’s riveting, smart, and a down right bad ass in this film.
  • This movie is EXTREMELY CREEPY!!!!!
  • Typical Horror movies like to have way too many funny moments in a film, not this one. It had it’s comedic relief in Winston Duke but it was perfectly timed comedy, not over done.
  • We are early in the year but let’s go ahead and hand Michael Abels the Oscar for his Score in this film.
  • Peele’s writing is damn right scary, I have never been captivated in a Horror film the way I was in this. I was creeped out all while battling with the inner thoughts in my head about overcoming

The Verdict:

**** 1/2 out of 5 stars

To be able to tell a compelling story within a creepy horror movie is not easy at all. This movie was the battle within us all and how we can overcome that. Most horror movies focus on “jump scares”, killings and satisfactory ending, this movie was the complete opposite. Peele gives you a reason to care about the characters, he puts Lupita in a position to just do what she is good at and act her ass off.

The rest of the cast was great, the Score is perfection (I expect an Oscar nomination), its visually haunting, edited to perfection and Peele has officially made me want to never go to the fair again.

Should You See it?: What are you waiting for? Peele is turning himself into one of the best Writer/Directors in the world. The story within the extreme craziness is worth the price of admission alone.

Tell me what you thought of the movie, hit me up on here or talk to me on Twitter @RickyValero_

The Valero Verdict: Captain Marvel

Welcome to another edition of the “The Valero Verdict” movie review. In this I will give you a quick movie review with a couple of bullet points of which I either liked or disliked. I will end the review with rating of the movie and a short overall thoughts.

On the docket today, Captain Marvel, the HIGHLY anticipated Marvel movie with Brie Larson in the driver seat.

  • Brie Larson was good. Maybe very good, depending on a second watch but, sometimes I felt a little underwhelmed by her and I am not sure if that was by design because other times I felt she knocked it out of the park.
  • Goose. Enough said.
  • Ben Mendelsohn – HELLLLLLL TO THE YES!!!!!!!!!!! I absolutley loved this man in this movie, he is extremely fun in this role and love to see him part of the universe.
  • One of my favorite scenes in the movie is when Brie Larson breaks into her own as the Captain Marvel character to the tune of Gwen Stefani’s “Just a Girl”.
  • The soundtrack is pure FIRE!!!!!!
  • The de-aging of Jackson is awesome to see. The editing was perfect. Like all Marvel movies, it was visually stunning.
  • Favorite Quote: “It’s a cat, not Hannibal Lector”

The Verdict:

**** out of ***** stars

I went back and forth with the rating on this, and honestly on a 2nd viewing I might rate it a little higher.

So many things about this film worked, I loved they paid homage to so many future things in the story. The soundtrack in this movie was great. The chemistry between Larson/Jackson is fantastic. The supporting cast all the way around is good. The story of this film was good, a solid twist, fun humor and all in all a great introductory of Captain Marvel. Just another notch on Marvel’s belt. (Also ready for the Goose vs. Rocket showdown)

Should You See It?: Seriously? Is this even a question? I am already planning on seeing it again just in case I missed anything. This movie made me even more hyped to see Endgame.

The Valero Verdict: A Madea Family Funeral

Welcome to another edition of the “The Valero Verdict” movie review. In this I will give you a quick movie review with a couple of bullet points of which I either liked or disliked. I will end the review with rating of the movie and a short overall thoughts.

On the docket today, A Madea Family Funeral, the final installment of the 11 Tyler Perry driven Madea movies.


  • Let me start with Uncle Heathrow, EVERY single time this man was on the screen, he stole the show. Just absolutely brilliant. It has been a very long time since a character had made me laugh as hard as I did when he was on screen.
  • And Tyler Perry’s character’s Madea/Joe/Brian, Aunt Bam and Hattie as always were super funny while on the screen.
  • Can I talk about David Otunga for a second? He could possibly be the worst actor I’ve ever seen on the big screen, I am not kidding. He was just awful.
  • The funeral scene was magical (All 80 hours of it), it was just well thought out and a whole lot of fun.
  • One of my favorite line of the movie was “I wanna know why his hoe, smell like his bro.”

The Verdict:

*** out of *****

My rating my be a bit generous but I don’t care, Uncle Heathrow deserves probably 5 stars on his own. The story was okay, nothing groundbreaking but they did put the pieces together throughout the film. I will say outside of the core Madea characters, the acting wasn’t really good (that includes Worst Actor of the Year nominee David Otunga). But you sure do laugh a whole lot and was a nice fitting end to the series.

Should I see it?: I went back and forth with whether or not you should see this in theaters or wait till Redbox/Digital. If you aren’t a big Marvel/Comic Book movie fan, totally go check this out this weekend.

Tell me what you thought of the movie, hit me up on here or talk to me on Twitter@rickygangster

The Valero Verdict: What Men Want

Welcome to another edition of the “The Valero Verdict” movie review. In this I will give you a quick movie review with a couple of bullet points of which I either liked or disliked. I will end the review with rating of the movie and a short overall thoughts.

On the docket today, What Men Want, the female driven version of the 2000 movie What Women Want. This one starring Taraji P. Henson.

  • The scene from the trailer in which she catches the ball, I probably saw that trailer a trillion times and even when it came on in the movie, it was still hilarious.
  • Why does sex in movies so outrageous looking? I will never understand why the over-blow how sex really is vs. how they portray it in movies.
  • Tracy Morgan as the Lavar Ball like character is absolute MASTERFUL, OH MY GOD!!!!!!!! Just brilliant.
  • I laughed, and laughed a lot. Between the Psychic scene in which she is playing with Tarot Cards and bust our a Uno Skip card to the Club Scene where they are acting like straight fools, I laughed from start to finish during this film.
  • Taraji P. Henson, she’s a star, period. She’s one of my favorite actress in Hollywood. I will always catch a movie she is in, in theaters.
  • It’s a feel good movie, it teaches you that you should watch how you treat people on your way to the top.

The Verdict:

*** out of ***** stars

The flow of the movie just worked, it started up, went down, somewhere in between act 1 and 2 we got our set-up and we settle down and got our ending. While the movie was predictable from start to finish and it’s okay, as long as the story works, and it did here.
I enjoyed the remake (revision) and wouldn’t hate the idea of a sequel either.

Should I See It?: Yes, absolutely yes. If you are thinking of seeing a movie this weekend, this should be the one. It’s a feel good movie with a whole lot of laughs.