The Valero Verdict: Pet Sematary

Welcome to another edition of the “The Valero Verdict” movie review. In this I will give you a quick movie review with a couple of bullet points of which I either liked or disliked. I will end the review with rating of the movie and a short overall thoughts.

On the docket today, Pet Sematary. The remake of 1989 Horror film based on a book by Stephen King.

look at that thing, it’s terrifying looking.
  • The only thing remotely scary about this film was the cat, I mean just look at it. If you stare at that picture long enough, the cat takes your soul.
  • Jason Clarke is an amazing actor. The ONLY thing about this film that was good was him. He is one of the best actors in Hollywood and it showed in this film. He’s emotion is so raw in this film, you just felt everything that he felt throughout the entire film.
  • They somehow managed to make a 1 hour and 41 minute run time feel like 3 hours. The 3rd act dragged out and it was so uninteresting at that.
  • THE BACK OF SEMI-TRUCK HIT A KID AND THE KID DIDN’T EVEN HAVE A MARK ON THEM. (sorry for yelling)
  • We’ve made 1.3 trillion (don’t fact check me) Horror movies, can people stop going into random dark rooms? or can they stop locking themselves in rooms? That would be just great.
  • Best quote in this movie: “Good thing your no fucking vet.”

The Verdict:

* out of ***** stars

This just wasn’t a good movie, not even Jason Clarke’s phenomenal performance could save this movie. Lithgow was good in it, but outside of that, predictable, not scary (Minus that Cat that is going to give me nightmares forever), and dragged out 3rd act, this was another remake we did not need.

Should You See It?: Absolutely not. I’ve really debated what movie was worse, this or Dumbo. I would pay to see Dumbo fight the cat from this, I would lay AT LEAST $20 on the cat. That in itself would be more entertaining than both of these trash movies.

Tell me what you thought of the movie, hit me up on here or talk to me on Twitter @RickyValero_

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